Indra Nooyi, Jeff Gordon: Maybe Pepsi Really Can't Do Anything Right

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dice.gif

It is well known that a good consultant can graph out a trend line using the random numbers from thrown dice. I have for you, Gentle Reader, still another data point in the continuing question of Pepsi Patriotism: The #24.

Your Business Blogger has allowed that Pepsi might, just might be able to get something right as Pepsi President, Indra Nooyi, gives America the Digitus Impudicus.

I thought her NASCAR sponsorship was an example of her loyalty to American Values.

But I was wrong.

Radio Blogger uses NASCAR teams to put blogs into neat discreet market segments. Radio Blogger puts them along his left sidebar as blogroll.

For example, under

Richard Petty Blogs, you have:

Hugh Hewitt

Instapundit

Michelle Malkin

Under Darrell Waltrip Oddblogs:

Lileks

The Corner

Virginia Postrel

And under Dale Earnhardt Jr. Wiseguy Blogs, one sees:

Fraters Libertas

Infinite Monkeys

Lucianne Goldberg

Shot In The Dark

Spitbull

However, the category that caught my attention was:

jeff_gordon_radioblogger.gif

Jeff Gordon Dark Side Blogs:

Buzz Machine

Daily Kos

Matthew Yglesias

Press Think

Princeton Progressive Review

TPM Cafe

So there you have it. Jeff Gordon, #24, is associated with very, very left of center anti-capitalists. And (gasp) Nooyi sponsors him.

The Finger, The Donation, and now, The Number.

(What all this has to do with Jeff Gordon is irrelevant. As long as I can draw a tight scatter diagram along a line.)

Pepsi President Indra Nooyi is consistent with her anti-American branding. Validated here in an unbiased third-party blog presentation uncovered by my crack research team. Nooyi continues to give America the finger.

Mere coincidence you say? Watch me prove it. On the next roll of the dice.

Like any good consultant.

###

Thank you (Foot)notes:

Chris Dickson is drinking only Coke.

Sepia Mutiny has Clout is Cool.

StlRecruiting says Pepsi should have a blog.

Gall and Wormwood points us to Chris Muir’s cartoon.

Kerfuffles has concerns.

Roscoe’s Blog has Saddam-Pepsico Connection. And a tax deduction.

Thanks to Mudville Gazette for Open Post.

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33 Responses

  1. suntanamara says:

    This blog sucks.

  2. suntanamara says:

    this blog sucks. screening comments won’t hide that.

  3. es says:

    Interesting that you don’t provide any links to the Iliberal blogs. Why is that?

  4. Jack Yoest says:

    Suntanamara, Sorry for the delay approving your comments. Both of them. Just got to them.

    It is 7am here in the USA.

    It is the goal and mission of my humble organization to move with the greatest dispatch in retrieving, reviewing and posting the observations of participants in this dialog from our friends world-wide.

    Thank you for critique. I would enjoy another comment, if I may trouble you, on other postings from Your Business Blogger. I might also like to trouble you for more a lengthly missive.

    Size counts.

    Namaste,

    Jack

  5. grepthis2000 says:

    Stumbled here by way of TBogg.

    I second the opinion expressed by Suntanamara. This site does suck.

    I have read/skimmed several of your posts and find your blog persona to be that of the quintessential management bullshit artist, self-satisfied, pompous, and addicted to facile and shallow concepts.

    I don’t think you are evil, except in the sense that as part of a class of similar people the collective effect of this aggregate is truly abhorrent.

    Just my opinion.

    How big is it?

    Namaste

    Grep

  6. Jack Yoest says:

    Grep,

    Goodness. I would imagine you don’t shop at WalMart, hate NASCAR, don’t care for capitalism nor your cubicle.

    Please don’t tell me you burn American flags for fun.

    Thank you for your input,

    Jack

  7. Sarcastro says:

    Jack,

    Goodness. I would imagine you don’t shop at bookstores, hate women, don’t care for black folks nor the poor.

    Please don’t tell me you have had children.

    Thank you for the laugh,

    Sarcastro

  8. Jim says:

    Funny thing about Richard Petty is, North Carolinians refused to elect him to office because he refused to take seriously the tasks germane to leadership, starting with candidacy.

    In short, he’s a perfect Hugh Hewitt linker.

    I don’t think your blog sucks, Jack. I think it’s a very important service, warning others not to err like you have–kinda like heads on a pike posted at the gates of a city.

  9. Jack Yoest says:

    Sarcastro:

    One wife,

    Five children,

    All mine. Mine.

    Out-breeding all those who would disagree

    With the ownership society.

    Your Good Business Blogger,

    Jack

  10. Davebo says:

    I suppose pointing out the fact that sites like Kos, TPM Cafe, and Matthew Yglesias bring in thousands upon thousands of dollars in ad revenue would be silly at this point.

    I mean, since we’ve already labeled them “anti capitalist”.

    But I similar instances throughout this blog.

    The only conclusion one could possibly reach is that the author wouldn’t know capitalism if it drove over him in a Hummer.

    Which is sort of sad since good old fasioned (or new fangled apparantly) capitalism appears to be a major subject of the blog.

  11. blotto says:

    Jack’s a dork. Is this guy a drunk? Will he buy us a round? He’s a dork.

  12. Jack Yoest says:

    Dear es,

    My, you are correct. (The challenge of having alert readers.)

    I need to be more subtle.

    Thanks,

    Jack

  13. GORT says:

    I think you might want to consider a different hobby. Leave the wit to people with wit. You sire are wit-out.

  14. elemental says:

    Wow, all these people here to criticise you and they can’t even bother to leave you some helpful criticism.

    Well I’ll try. Like others, I believe you are empty, boring and pointless. Here’s why:

    You posess that all too common quality where you think if someone (especially if they have a funny name) says something you don’t like, even when it may or may not be the most mild criticism, you act as if they have personally spit on your wife and tossed poo on your children. Get over yourself, stop being a baby and grow up.

  15. Jack Yoest says:

    Goodness Gort,

    Plotting a scatter diagram can be a very, very humorous.

    Surely you can understand.

    Thank you for your comment,

    Jack

  16. grepthis says:

    Jack,

    Golly-gee. I do shop at Walmart when quality is not an issue since the prices are low. I do feel guilty since Walmart is built on mercilessly exploiting its workers. I also shop at Costco, (the anti-Walmart), which provides quality goods at low prices while paying a decent wage to employees who are treated with respect by the company.

    NASCAR is just plain dumb. I’m not a beer guzzling toothless redneck.

    Capitalism is fine except as practiced by the current crop of management geniuses: Enron, Worldcom, ‘Chainsaw Al’, Tyco …

    20 years from now the Chinese are going to be trampling on American capitalism’s rotting carcass, destroyed by your ilk.

    The cubicle is fine, it’s where the real work is done by people who take responsibility for what they do, and are paid according to merit.

    No, I wouldn’t burn the American flag, but I don’t cheapen it by equating it with Walmart and capitalism.

    In your search for cliched symbols you forgot motherhood, apple pie, baseball, and the Boy Scouts.

  17. The Drill SGT says:

    Jack,

    I admire your positive attitude. Where did all the trolls come from? Keep at it.

    Shoot, Move, and Communicate

  18. sxp151 says:

    What a hilarious blog. Not a single actual reader, just people sent here by TBogg, who for some reason “gets” what the “point” of this “post” was. To the rest of us, it’s three layers of self-referentiality. I actually tried–yes I did!–I tried to follow all the links to make sense of this post. No luck.

    Let’s see: scatter diagram? None to be found. Pepsi President giving the finger? Can’t find that either. So let’s see: you’re linking to a blogger who’s slightly more famous than you are (in the sense of having a nonzero number of readers), complaining about his/her style of linking, and then Pepsi is to blame? Um, what?

    By the way, I hope you thank TBogg for all this traffic.

  19. Eric says:

    as a long time Gordon fan and a liberal, maybe I prove your point. However, from reading this mush you’ve written, I believe you admit that you don’t have a point, and you’re just making things up.

    I know that wingnuts don’t like Gordon, but there isn’t any good reason why except maybe that he was the only driver in the chase last year that had the business sense not to endorse a presidential candidate. The only outwardly political driver is Michael Walthrip, and he’s obnoxious about it. If I was a corporate sponsor, I wouldn’t touch him with a ten foot pole. That’s business. If he was liberal and this outspoken, I’m pretty sure he wouldn’t have a job.

    Gordon has a ton of fans, and he makes his sponsors money. That’s why Pepsi sponsors him.

  20. BorrowSpend says:

    Five children,

    “All mine. Mine.

    Out-breeding all those who would disagree

    With the ownership society.”

    Well, that’s fine. But are you pre-supposing that all your spawn will agree with you? You might beget the next Karl Marx or Hugo Chavez.

  21. Jack Yoest says:

    Jim, “heads on pikes” are ordinarily not good for business.

    But I can think of an exception. I attended an Alice Cooper concert or two a hundred years ago. He made an very good living chopping off heads for entertainment.

    So I actually take your comment seriously: Alice could fill a stadium with paying patrons.

    I think he’s doing commercials for Visa now. Or Viagra.

    Best,

    Jack

  22. Jack Yoest says:

    BorrowSpend,

    You are quite right. Kids are very much thier own creatures (even if Charmaine and I think we have some influence.)

    But you are on to a greater truth. I got spawn. You (generic) got none.

    I get the chance to mold the next generation, the future.

    I got kids. You get comments. It’s nice to have both.

    I think you are hoping that I might have the next “Karl Marx or Hugo Chavez.”

    I am praying for the next Karl Rove or Linda Chavez.

    Thank you for your points,

    Jack

  23. Jack Yoest says:

    Dear sxp151,

    You are right: I actually did find a graph that predicted die rolls. Perhaps I should have used it. Maybe the post would have been funnier.

    But I actually have a bigger problem — I would assume readers knew something of the Nooyi controversy about her speech to a Columbia MBA class. Links to other sites didn’t seem to fill out the background story; at least in your reading.

    I linked, I think, to Charmaine Yoest, Ph.D.. (Some of your writing hinted at competence — I did marry way over my head.)

    Your comments however, are helpful and instructive.

    Napolean had a corporal. I got you.

    Please comment back on being Napolean’s corporal — maybe I need to make posts less complicated.

    Thank you,

    Jack

  24. Jack Yoest says:

    elemental,

    You are not quite right: “(especially if they have a funny name).”

    With a name like ‘Yoest’ I am very slow to criticize any unusual name.

    Jack

  25. Jack Yoest says:

    Dear grepthis,

    I’ve been to NASCAR events, everyone there seemed to have dental work up to date. But I think they did enjoy a beer or two.

    You would be comfortable at NASCAR: lots of tattoos. Take ear protection when you go.

    Joe Gibbs also has all his teeth and enjoyed an 8 figure run with his cars making all those left turns.

    You’d love the left turnings.

    “Motherhood, applepie…” American cliches. Not what I was thinking.

    I had more in mind of US Army, Salvation Army, MicroSoft.

    or Dropping that bomb on Hiroshima, cleaning out Afghanistan or saving France. Twice.

    or US Constitution, Private property, Contract law.

    We know how to get business done.

    But you are right about China being the USA’s next threat. War with China is a coming on the heels of the Jihadists. USA will win both. Without you, unfortunately.

    Best,

    Jack

  26. Jack Yoest says:

    Eric, well written comment, for a man with no teeth.

    “NASCAR is just plain dumb. I’m not a beer guzzling toothless redneck,” from my good friend grepthis.

    Thank you for your input,

    Jack

  27. Chadwick says:

    Let me get this straight- you’re STILL banging the drum about a single comment Nooyi made months ago and apologized for? Furthermore, you’ve decided to drag Jeff Gordon (who didn’t make those comments) into this because some OTHER blogger organized political blogs by NASCAR racers?

    Back into your teapot, Mr. Tempest.

    Let it go. I know you’re trying to drum up traffic to your wife’s (also un-read) blog, but this is really, really stupid.

    Hope that’s constructive enough for you.

    FYI- I would go back and re-consider our current “cake-walk” before crowing about beating China. Macho posturing is often worse than useless, if you believe your own hype.

  28. Jack Yoest says:

    Chadwick,

    Yes, still flogging the Pepsi brand management and will continue to do so. This is an outstanding case study on how lose customers.

    For example,

    Nooyi did not apologize — I’ve reviewed her statements of backpedaling. But I’ve not seen an apology.

    Kenye West as spokesman. This gentleman believes the USA government formulated AIDS to kill black people in Africa.

    Members of US Armed Forces are boycotting Pepsi.

    Nooyi and husband are five figure donors to the Democrat Party.

    And they sponsor Jeff #24.

    And Nooyi has you as a friend.

    Reasons to drink COKE.

    This point of the post is that alienating customers is never good business. Just as in politics — high negatives are losing propositions.

    Nooyi surrenders market share — Chadwich surrenders to China.

    Best,

    Jack

  29. elemental says:

    Hey Jack, a few questions –

    Don’t all the ‘World Peace’ ads that Coke put out make you upset?

    Or are those concerns offset with the reality of how they treat their foriegn labor and resources?

    Your obsession with the Pepsi CEO – are you that petty or that neurotic that your still going on about a f$#%#^ graduation speech?

    Why do you act as if making campaign contributions to someone you don’t personally endorse make them a traitor? If they had been 5 figure donators to Bush/Cheney should they have then been welcomed to the WH? And wouldn’t that be akin to renting out the Lincoln bdrm?

    Is Yoest really a funny name? I think not – it’s about as European sounding as anything else I can think of.

    Do you think you can admit that you’re a petty, mildly racist wanker who is dragging our country into the intellectual sewer?

    BTW, Pepsi seems to have dropped Kanye for what he said. I guess you’ll be happy about that. We know how much you hyper-patriotic phonies love it when the ‘free market’ outweighs personal freedom of speech and thought (that’s not really what happens, but I know you’ll make that argument anyway so I just figure I’d skip a step and also let you answer on your own, incorrect grounds).

    I know I ask a lot of questions but if you could take a second away from that game of ‘Risk’ you’re playing with yourself I would appreciate some feedback. Thanks!

  30. Chadwick says:

    Oh come now, Jack- I’ve read her response, and it’s extremely contrite.

    I’m curious, is Nooyi not allowed to use the hand metaphor for continents/countries? Or can she only use it as long as she rhetorically amputates the middle finger?

    For that matter, what sort of intellectual dishonesty is required to not recall our shameful hostility towards our allies in the run-up to the cakewal… er, Iraq II? (“Old Europe” ring any bells?)

    Curiously, it’s your lovely wife Charmaine who is acting churlish on her webpage (demanding “bling”, calling Nooyi a “bimbo”.) I know she has lovely rationalizations for it, but the fact remains that she’s engaging in personal attacks because her delicate sensibilities have been offended. (Also, she doesn’t seem to grasp html, given how often her links lead back to the top of the page).

    Finally, you mention Pepsi loosing market share. According to my research, they were up a billion dollars compared to the previous quarter last year. However, I’m sure they weep when they think of you spitefully buying Powerade. (Coincidentally, Powerade always seems to be on sale. I wonder why that is…)

    With regards to surrendering to China- You’re projecting. You whole-heartedly support a political movement that has wrecked our treasury by indebting us to the Chinese and other Asian investors. All the chest beating in the world doesn’t change that. Actions speak louder than words vis a vis who is “surrendering”.

    And finally, it is “Chadwick”

    Regards,

    Chad

    ps: I see from Amanda Marcotte’s site that Charmaine is upset about your daughters virginity being devalued. Exactly how much income was Ms. Yoest expecting from the sale of that hymen?

  31. Footie says:

    First of all. Stop hijacking Nascar for your silly agenda. It is as diverse politically as any other sport.

    Second. I hope that you and your wife and your entire family drink as much coke as you can. Power up with Powerade. My kids would envy yours as they are not allowed soda and their football coach doesn’t allow powerade or gatorade.

    One would think that a true intelligent conservative would be horrified by a lot of what is happening in Washington right now but instead focuses on this tripe…

    Oh, sorry, now I get why you are advertising free consulting.

    Nascar fan and Massachusetts liberal

  32. Jack Yoest says:

    Footie, thank you for your comment. Liberal Mark Warner (cell phone magnate) won the Govenorship of Red State Virginia attending NASCAR events.

    And now a liberal from Mass. loves car racing?

    Next you’ll tell me you have a son going into the Army. Ours.

    Best,

    Jack

  33. I caught your posting of my refusing to drink Pepsi….It’s true, I only allow Coke in my house !!!

    The difference between me and Liberals is that I we drink it and they (the “Unhinged”)obviously snort it…