Hey Charmaine! You were poised and articulate (as always!). I love Cavuto’s show. I did notice the line on the screen saying “Single women buying homes: Ruining America?” Obviously, the producers didn’t understand what you were saying AT ALL. I’m a single (divorced) mother, and I bought my current home myself. Your point that it’s representative of the breakdown of the family is exactly right–I bought it because I wanted some stability, some security after my divorce (which I didn’t instigate) for my daughter and me. I probably won’t remarry, at least not for quite a long time, so I figured why throw away money on rent? I’ve got to provide for my daughter’s college education some day, and owning my own home can only help in that goal–since I can’t count on my ex-husband AT ALL. I’d bet most single mothers are in somewhat the same mindset. (Obviously, I’m not talking about never-married singles here.)
It’s kind of funny how the other woman seemed ready to believe that your opinion of single women was that we’re the root of all that’s bad in society. Typical prejudices! You did a great job putting that idea to rest. Thanks!
Charmaine, I enjoy reading your blog and think you are a great advocate for life and the family, but I must disagree wholeheartedly with your comments on the Cavuto show
I say this as a staunchly prolife, profamily single woman who proudly owns her own home (and is glad for the tax benefits alone). It is unsound to rent for years on end while waiting for a Mr. Right who may never come along. Such women may find themselves far worse off than if they had bought sooner, and having some financial wisdom makes a woman a better marriage partner, not worse.
For that reason, I also take issue with Jack’s comment about women being more easily able to leave a marriage if they are financially secure. The converse of that is that women in a bad (e.g. abusive) marriage are simply stuck if they are financially insecure. Having financial security is good for men and women.
Perhaps this is not what you meant, Charmaine, but I think your comments were reminiscent of the smug marrieds despised by Bridget Jones. Do women generally want to be 30, single, and a homeowner? Probably not (and that includes yours truly), but it beats being 35 or 40 and single and having wasted thousands of dollars on rent that could have been building a nest egg for her future family, retirement, or whatever. Home ownership and being profamily are not mutually exclusive, even for never-married singles. I would even argue that having good money management skills (e.g. investing in a home as appropriate) is a profamily atribuute, not antifamily.
If you want a better angle for your comments, you could comment on today’s Post piece on the 11 single women who have the same sperm donor for their children. Now that, in my view, is a legitimate target for antifamily behavior on the part of single people – that is, those who set out to bring fatherless or motherless children into the world without regard to the child’s best interests (having two parents).
Hope you don’t mind my providing a different point of view. Thanks. Annie
Part One: On Single Women and Buying Homes. . . and Sperm
A thoughtful reader, Annie, wrote to respond to my remarks on the Neil Cavuto show about the increasing percentages of single women buying homes. Just to recap: I was arguing in counterpoint to the “girl power” perspective which sees this…
Hey Charmaine! You were poised and articulate (as always!). I love Cavuto’s show. I did notice the line on the screen saying “Single women buying homes: Ruining America?” Obviously, the producers didn’t understand what you were saying AT ALL. I’m a single (divorced) mother, and I bought my current home myself. Your point that it’s representative of the breakdown of the family is exactly right–I bought it because I wanted some stability, some security after my divorce (which I didn’t instigate) for my daughter and me. I probably won’t remarry, at least not for quite a long time, so I figured why throw away money on rent? I’ve got to provide for my daughter’s college education some day, and owning my own home can only help in that goal–since I can’t count on my ex-husband AT ALL. I’d bet most single mothers are in somewhat the same mindset. (Obviously, I’m not talking about never-married singles here.)
It’s kind of funny how the other woman seemed ready to believe that your opinion of single women was that we’re the root of all that’s bad in society. Typical prejudices! You did a great job putting that idea to rest. Thanks!
Charmaine, I enjoy reading your blog and think you are a great advocate for life and the family, but I must disagree wholeheartedly with your comments on the Cavuto show
I say this as a staunchly prolife, profamily single woman who proudly owns her own home (and is glad for the tax benefits alone). It is unsound to rent for years on end while waiting for a Mr. Right who may never come along. Such women may find themselves far worse off than if they had bought sooner, and having some financial wisdom makes a woman a better marriage partner, not worse.
For that reason, I also take issue with Jack’s comment about women being more easily able to leave a marriage if they are financially secure. The converse of that is that women in a bad (e.g. abusive) marriage are simply stuck if they are financially insecure. Having financial security is good for men and women.
Perhaps this is not what you meant, Charmaine, but I think your comments were reminiscent of the smug marrieds despised by Bridget Jones. Do women generally want to be 30, single, and a homeowner? Probably not (and that includes yours truly), but it beats being 35 or 40 and single and having wasted thousands of dollars on rent that could have been building a nest egg for her future family, retirement, or whatever. Home ownership and being profamily are not mutually exclusive, even for never-married singles. I would even argue that having good money management skills (e.g. investing in a home as appropriate) is a profamily atribuute, not antifamily.
If you want a better angle for your comments, you could comment on today’s Post piece on the 11 single women who have the same sperm donor for their children. Now that, in my view, is a legitimate target for antifamily behavior on the part of single people – that is, those who set out to bring fatherless or motherless children into the world without regard to the child’s best interests (having two parents).
Hope you don’t mind my providing a different point of view. Thanks. Annie
Part One: On Single Women and Buying Homes. . . and Sperm
A thoughtful reader, Annie, wrote to respond to my remarks on the Neil Cavuto show about the increasing percentages of single women buying homes. Just to recap: I was arguing in counterpoint to the “girl power” perspective which sees this…